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self portrait: lee lee and henri

on november 18th, my life changed forever.

 

despite his best efforts to stay in my belly forever, henri owen lee finally joined us in the outside world. 

 

nothing about my birth experience went as expected; i imagine this, more than anything, should prepare me for life as a parent.

 

right now, he has beautiful blue eyes and a good amount of strawberry blonde hair--just like his momma.  unlike me, he also has the constitution and attitude of a true redhead, right down to the way his entire body turns bright red with anger when all attention is not on him.   okay...maybe he does get some of that from me.

 

i can't fathom what made me think i was qualified to do this, nor can i conjure up any sort of realistic expectation of what the future now holds.  (already, i long for a bed of my own...preferably one i don't have to get out of every 3 hours).  but what i do know is that no amount of lost freedom can compare to his sweet smile.  even if it is just gas, it still makes my heart do a great big flip-flop.

COMMENTS
Lackienole said at 4:18 p.m. on Nov 27, 2007:
eloquently written as always. and beautiful pictures.
JuDeck said at 10:28 p.m. on Nov 27, 2007:
so sweet
Ericf said at 2:01 p.m. on Nov 28, 2007:
"i can't fathom what made me think i was qualified to do this, nor can i conjure up any sort of realistic expectation of what the future now holds."

I think all parents feel this way upon holding a newborn, I know I did. It just sorta happens, the newness wears off and you just adjust. Don't worry about doing it right...and don't worry about feelings you are supposed to have...just do it. It may sound weird, but you're just getting to know that little bundle so don't overload yourself with expectations. Realize that it's a match made in heaven and it will take care of itself.
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